More than one

Personal ad tag:

looking for a guy who wants more than a one nightstand

Right now I have only one nightstand, but I’d like two. That way, I’d have a place for my book when I’m ready to go to sleep, without possibly having to move to the other side of the bed to put it down. Yes, two nightstands for me please! One on either side of the bed.

Wait, are you a furniture salesperson?


Personal ad tag:

seeking man with boat

If that’s a euphemism, it escapes me. If it’s the literal truth, she’s unusually mercenary.

Why would a man be interested in her when she’s only interested in his boat? She should make it worth the potential guy’s time and say she’ll bang him like an old screen door every time he takes her out on the water. Give-and-take, you know?