Let’s take the issue of tailgating, for which you can now receive an on-the-spot fine of £100, making it as serious now, in the eyes of the courts, as burglary, light murder, and smashing an old lady in the face with a bat. “Good,” shrieked green-ink Britain. “I hate being tailgated and I shall definitely vote Conservative, now that offenders are to receive the same punishment as rapists.”

Jeremy Clarkson
“Clarkson on: middle-lane hogging”